There is this super savvy young man that I know, and, am privileged to have as a friend on Facebook. He’s equal parts wit and wisdom; someone I can count on to make me laugh and to provide his frank and even-handed perspective on timely issues. So naturally, I’m drawn to this Facebook posts, including his series of posts on protecting your peace and cleansing your Facebook from the elements (people who serve no purpose, are combative, and add nothing really to your existence.)
He’s been sharing a number of gems that I think we can all relate to and benefit from, with his approval, I’m happy to share them with you. We truly hope that you will take stock of your social media spaces and fill them with people who are good for your mental and emotional health.
2020 has been rough, there is no denying that. From untimely and sudden deaths, to a global pandemic to national elections that was truly draining; we need a break. We also need to ensure that we fill our spaces with good people with good information. People who are kind, considerate, who know to have healthy discussions and a good joke, and can spot and not share fake news and inaccurate information. It is important for us to do all that we can to cleanse our spaces and protect our mental and emotional health. In addition to our previous article on Protecting Your Mental Health, here are some additional tips from Derwayne, to cut and clear all crosses from your Facebook and all your social media spaces.
- Useful tip for removing persons from your social media. You can scroll your entire friends list, and that takes time especially if you have a lot of persons on your list. You could also just wait for their birthdays, but not everyone includes their birthdays. I find it useful to look for statuses that you disapprove of heavily. You might want to just delete the person that posted it. But what about the persons who responded positively to the status? They might also be on your list and worthy of social media purging.
- Some social media users are upset by the presence of someone’s name in their news feed but continue to follow that person. That is being unkind to yourself. You might have experienced people who do this. They are the ones who seldom react to anything you post unless it is to make a combative comment. Sometimes, they perform microaggression directly. There are other times where they would rather engage in passive aggression by trivialising your posts or endorsing combative comments made by other persons under your posts. If you are triggered by someone’s presence on your social media, be kind to yourself and remove them. I’ve also used this assessment in sanitising my friends list.
- Your friends can also be toxic on social media. Unfriending them does not necessarily mean you are disinterested in the friendship. It could mean you prefer to take that friend in controlled doses. Social media does NOT give you that control.
- Some persons are only interested in increasing the number of followers on their Facebook. They have no intention of engaging you in conversation. You have never spoken to them before. Try reaching out to them, if there is zero acknowledgement whatsoever after two attempts (including read messages with no responses), spare yourself the pain and unfriend them. Unless you’re into stalking and voyeurism. Then, get help.
- You can’t control what people post, but you can control who you let into your social media spaces.
- In your social media cleansing, delete everybody with a false name that you don’t know personally. The anonymity sometimes makes them more reckless and less accountable for the things they post, share and comment. When confronted, they sometimes show no remorse because their offline identity is kept separate from their online identity. The same is true if they don’t have photos.
- You might forget about people on your list because you haven’t seen any statuses from them based on Facebook’s algorithm. But, check your stories. There is always someone in your stories that you just don’t know how they got there.
Time for some cleansing. It is important for YOU to protect YOUR own space and mental health. Like Derwayne says, “Be well to yourself”.
Gems from Derwayne Wills.