We are all guilty of starting romantic relationships without being adequately prepared or ready for them. It is natural for us to crave companionship and intimacy however there are many things that we need to address before we take that major leap of faith.
Truth is, most of us feel hurt and lost after our relationships end because our expectations were unrealistically high and we forget that no human (not even our self) is infallible. Entering a relationship is a major gamble as you can never be sure of how much (or little) your significant other really cares for you.
Most of us are going to be in relationships at some point in of our lives, here are five signs that tell you that now is not exactly the right time -:
1. You desperately need to be in a relationship– Entering a relationship because you are unhappy or sexually frustrated is never a good option. Relationships almost never put you on the road to happiness. Happy single people are the most eligible people for relationships. While sex is very important in romantic relationships, it must never be the foundation of it – the sex will not be euphoric forever.
2. You’ve not yet discovered who you are or what you want– Relationships should not be the avenue for finding yourself. Knowing exactly who you are and what you want from your relationship enables you to communicate it to your prospect from the get go. This way you know early on if you are compatible or not. Ask yourself questions like: Do I want to get married or have kids? Am I red or yellow? What are my thoughts on religion, my country’s political situation and sharing passwords?
3. You are self loathing and insecure – People in relationships with self loathing or insecure people do one of two things: end the relationship or control and abuse their partners. It is absolutely necessary for you to love yourself before you think about loving anyone else.
4. Your last relationship ended less than three months– Understand why your previous relationship failed and accept your folly before entering into a new one. You will not get better results in a new relationship if you haven’t grown from your previous one.
5. You are too self absorbed/independent– Selfish people cannot love unconditionally; it is always their way or the highway. People who are too independent often have an “I am with you but I do not need to be ($$$$$$)” approach to relationships. Relationship are about “we” not “I(s)” which means there is need for compromise and both parties should feel equally important/needed.